First tick off the list!

Well I did it. I headed out with the kids this afternoon.

It may not have been the planned picnic – it was far too hot today – but we headed to the dam for a swim before picking up Ray from work.

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The water was freezing but that didn’t stop them from running into it the minute they got out of the car.

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They have always been water babies. They love it splashing about with each other and on a day as hot as today was, it was certainly refreshing.

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The one thing we do miss about living out here is the beach, but the dam is certainly the next best thing…. And no surf or waves to stress about!

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I can definitely see trips to the dam being high on the agenda this summer.

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School holiday plans

So, I’m sure I’ve spoken about it before but now that school holidays are here again the issue has returned.

What am I rambling on about I hear you ask. Well, it may sound extremely silly, stupid in fact for a mum of 5, but I get highly anxious about taking all the kids out somewhere on my own.

I don’t know why it is exactly. They are good kids, and for the most part behave, but never the less I have little freak outs when the need to venture out with them all arises.

I have promised the kids that these holidays we will get out of the house and do something’s together and not just on the weekend. So, with Ray working during the day all holidays, it’s up to me to plan the activities and follow through with my promise.

Today I was supposed to take them all to an indoor playground in Brisbane. Nanny purchased them passes to go but again today I’ve woken up with a terrible headache. I am a migraine sufferer but a little part of me can’t help but think, the headache is actually caused my anxiety about taking them.

I ALWAYS avoid taking the kids to those places especially without Ray to back me up.

But, with all that said, it’s time to mum up, not let my anxieties ruin the school holidays and have some fun.

I’ve made a list of all the things I AM going to do with the kids these holidays.

I will check in with all as each activity is enjoyed (see I’m being positive).

1. Visit a water park
2. Head to the indoor playground – and use our gifted vouchers
3. Visit the local library
4. Go out for a yummy breakfast or lunch
5. Picnic and swim at the dam

There we go. It may not be a huge list, there are some things we will also be heading out to do with Ray, but I think this is manageable….for me.

Wish me luck xx

Wordless Wednesday

We had 4 weeks together before Ray started back at his new job. 4 weeks of enjoying each others company, annoying each other immensely and 4 weeks of doing things we had on our to do list since we moved.

This weeks Wordless Wednesday is all about sharing with you the fun times we had.

A visit to Australia Zoo on Father’s Day, a country drive to the historic Rudd’s Pub and weekend picnic at Wivenhoe Dam.

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Australia Zoo was a hit!

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Especially when Jayden and Ray were selected to take part in a race in the Crocoseum.

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Fun in the Sun – a day at the dam.

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Ice blocks after a true pub lunch – Rudd’s Pub

I love these times when we can forget about all our troubles and just enjoy being with each other.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Returning from Hiatus

So I left you all a little over a month ago. My last post was about finding myself. I wish I could say during the last month I did, but alas that is not so. I do, however, think I am more closer to realizing my passion.

The last 6 weeks have been very big for our family. Filled with high and lows.

The day before Ray was due to return home on his usual R&R he rang me to tell me he had been made redundant – a big low.

A few days later I celebrated my 30th birthday surrounded by family and friends – a high.

We then found out the owner of our beautiful house has decided they now need to sell and we would need to move at the end of our lease – a very big low.

So we have spent the last few weeks, stressing, worrying but at the same time enjoying our family time together.

Ray has now secured a new job which is close to home so that means he will be home EVERY NIGHT! A very big bonus. While we were handling the FIFO lifestyle it was definitely having its effects on the kids, especially Roman. They were missing their daddy immensely.

We are still yet to find somewhere new to move to but we have made the decision we will stay within this area, we are all settled, the kids have made friends, as have we and we really do love our country change.

We have agreed though that if we can not find another property we will move back into town. Even more incentive to save, save, save in order to purchase our own.

I have also returned to my study. I can not be certain if it’s the direction I will eventually take but for now I am enjoying it and that’s the main thing.

So there you have it, a quick wrap up of where we have been and what we have been dealing with. I am so very grateful for the support our friends and family have shown us during this time. There were some days were it felt like all our dreams were collapsing around us and without their encouragement to look for the positive in it all I am not sure we could have managed.

All I can say now, is bring on the next few months! 🙂

 

 

 

What does my future hold?

Is it too early to be going through a mid-life crisis?!

Next week I will celebrate my 30th birthday and am struggling with a personal dilemma. There is one question that has been haunting me for years now and I am still no closer to the answer.

“What do I want to be when I grow up?”

I love my role as a mum. I love being able to take them to school everyday and be waiting for the at the gates when they finish. Being able to attend their sports carnivals and assemblies. I am privileged to be able to be a stay at home mum, but I feel like I am destined for more.

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I want to do more. I want to be a contributor to our household budget, monetarily. We have dreams and plans to buy our own property. Build our own farm. Travel. Take our children on holidays and trips around the country.

The reality is that we are a large family and as the kids grow so will our expenses. We accept that, we chose that. In order to support all that we desire a dual income will be one day a necessity.

I want to work as well. I want to have focus on a passion and excel at it. But there in turn lies my issue….what am I passionate about?

I have started so many courses, degrees and chosen paths but I think, if I am honest, I have chosen them because it’s what I think people would expect me to do or because they are what is easiest for me to do while home alone with the children.

I say started because I am yet to complete any. None of them I have been really passionate about.

So, how do I find my passion. How do I work out what I want to do?

I still want to be able to have that flexibility of being available for my children. I want to still attend the important things. Am I wanting too much? Can I be a working mum, doing something I love but still have my family as my priority?

I feel like I should already have all this worked out. Like at this stage in my life I should know what I want to do….but I don’t, and I feel time is slipping away.

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I am very lucky in the fact that Ray is supportive in whatever it is I choose to do. If I was to say I want to stay home forever and not work, I could, but he knows that working and finding a passion that is my own is important to me.

But I’m still stuck for an answer to the question….what do I want to do?

Hopefully I will have that epiphany and know exactly what it is. It until then, I guess, I will keep searching.

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Jayden is 9!

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It was 9 years ago today that my life was changed forever. It was 9 years ago today I became a Mum!

Today is my oldest baby’s birthday! I had no idea though just how much that day would change my life, for the better.

Like many first time pregnancies, my due date came and went. 10 days after his “expected” arrival we trotted off to the hospital to be induced. We made our way to birth suite, then onto the ward. After I settled in Ray headed home to get some sleep. All the nurses assumed being my first time, I would have a long labour and didn’t expect me to deliver until well into the next day…. Oh how they were wrong.

Once contractions started, it was a speedy 3 hours until we finally met our little man.

Jayden David Lewis made us an instant family of 3!

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He was a beautiful, bright & alert baby. He just looked at us when he was born with his big, dark eyes. He didn’t whisper a sound, just stared, like he had been here before.

At 10 months old he took his first steps. By his 1st birthday he was well on his way to toddlerhood and he hasn’t slowed down.

He is a beautiful, smart and confident young man. One both his dad and I are immensely proud of.

I know he is destined for greatness and I am so lucky to have been chosen to be his mum.

Happy Birthday Jayden. We love you buddy xxx

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